Foreword / by Mark Nepo -- Part I. This is all just as crazy as you think it is -- The reality of loss -- The second half of the sentence: why words of comfort feel so bad -- It's not you, it's us: our models of grief are broken -- Emotional illiteracy and the culture of blame -- The new model of grief -- Part II. What to do with your grief -- Living in the reality of loss -- You can't solve grief, but you don't have to suffer -- How (and why) to stay alive -- What happened to my mind? Dealing with grief's physical side effects -- Grief and anxiety: calming your mind when logic doesn't work -- What does art have to do with anything? -- Find your own image of "recovery" -- Part III. When friends and family don't know what to do -- Should you educate or ignore them? -- Rallying your support team: helping them help you -- Part IV. The way forward -- The tribe of after: companionship, true hope, and the way forward -- Love is the only thing that lasts -- Appendix. How to help a grieving friend.