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While the current conversation about work-family balance and having it all tends to focus on women, both men and women are harmed when conditions make it impossible to balance meaningful work with family life. Yet, both will benefit from re-evaluating what it means to have it all and fighting for changes in their relationships and society to make greater equality possible. Here, Miriam Liss and Holly Hollomon Schiffrin discuss the ways in which we all define having it all and how we can obtain it for ourselves through a better evaluation of what we want from ourselves, our families, our jobs, and each other. Determining a 5050 division of labor around the house may not be the thing that works for everyone. Working from home or not at all may not be the thing to bring us satisfaction, but learning what studies show and how to feel balanced and make those decisions to bring balance is crucial.