About this item
NOW A MAJOR MOTION PICTURESTOP.You should not have touched this book with your bare hands.NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you.My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours.You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye.The only defense is knowledge. You need to read John Dies at the End, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why? You just have to trust me.The important thing is this:The drug is called Soy Sauce and it gives users a window into another dimension. John and I never had the chance to say no. You still do.Unfortunately for us, if you make the right choice, we'll have a much harder time explaining how to fight off the otherworldly invasion currently threatening to enslave humanity. I'm sorry to have involved you in this, I really am. But as you read about these terrible events and the very dark epoch the world is about to enter as a result, it is crucial you keep one thing in mind: None of this is was my fault.
About the Author
"DAVID WONG is the pseudonym of Jason Pargin, New York Times bestselling author of the John Dies at the End series as well as the award-winning Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits. His essays at Cracked.com have been read by tens of millions of people around the world. ZOEY PUNCHES THE FUTURE IN THE DICK: A Novel, the second book in the Zoey Ashe series, arrives in October of 2020."
